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Wilderness Hymnal

by Brandon Wadley

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Beverly Holliday
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Beverly Holliday I love listening to this music. It's inspiring, uplifting and challenging too. The vocals are great and the melodies are better than anything I've heard in a long time. You are blessed and a blessing! Thank you for sharing your gifts.
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1.
Roll down the windows! The night air is finally able to bring back your cold heart to warmth again from all these months of winter, And it's been growing secrets deeper than you think you'll ever be able to tell anyone outside the surface. Infinite, infallible love from his side as soon as you think you're maybe enough to be. I know you've been trying so hard to fight and your faith in yourself has been burning you alive and it's taking control of what you thought you'd find in yourself. I don't really think I'm capable of getting clean, at least in who I know I am and who'll I'll be, filling all the spaces in between the scenes of what I really want and what I know I need. I need someone that's not me to tell me I'm alright, even when I know I'm not really fine. Could I have dreamed of a love more extravagant, acceptance more pure, and a grace more alive? And I'm taking it in, yeah, the way that I'm used to with finite means and describable ends? It's my own filthy lifeline, my comparisons. I don't really think I'm capable of getting clean, at least in who I know I am and who'll I'll be, filling all the spaces in between the scenes of what I really want and what I know I need. I need someone that's not me to tell me I'm alright, even when I know I'm not really fine. I don't really think I'm capable of getting clean, at least in who I know I am and who'll I'll be, filling all the spaces in between the scenes of what I really want and what I know I need. I need someone that's not me to tell me I'm alright, even when I know I'm not really fine.
2.
Before you walk out of your front door, no one is safe from your defense. In attempts to justify yourself, you're constructing sides of arguments with a fight that you've designed in your own mind. The difference between what you've seen and what you've heard is that your worth's defined apart from what you've earned. The balance you think you'll find in your accomplishments, on your own time, will leave you aching like a legacy. The sun rises on the weak and the strong. Every river’s got its rain. Don't want your imitation, your monstrous mitigation. If you're not yourself, then who do you have left? Poster child with blinding lights, idolize the dust that's only now alive. Ribcage girls or suits and necklines with their perfect made up lines, papers and the cameras making sure they get your good side. Sedated your wild spirit for a weaker nervous side, but the wilderness in you reveals mine. Is it not your shameful fight that keeps you up at night and in the morning keeps you quiet? The sun rises on the weak and the strong. Every river’s got its rain. Don't want your imitation, your monstrous mitigation. If you're not yourself, then who do you have left? If you're not yourself, then who do you have left?
3.
Man's greatest spaceflight will match eternity's gaze; maiden voyage for the great beyond, it's a wonder you can't shake. Sunspots cutting all transmissions as I can't feel my feet, back home they are cheering me on through their analog TVs. Glory the explorers, laud the ideal of the brave. I'm at five percent on manual on my solo escapade. We're all gonna live in outer space one day. Our sojourner souls for another world await. Questions from the radio warn me of the craze, that I may find no answers up there; I've been flying for a hundred days. There's a bright light that's blinding from this craft with its metal sides, but with a hard glass shield and an iron will, I eclipse the queen of the tide. I am just an astronaut with no genius in my frame as anti gravity disorients even the soundest minds in space. We're all gonna live in outer space one day. Our sojourner souls for another world await. Upon the last atmospheric orbital I once was clear. I saw the black and blue and swirling gray of insecurity, pain, and fear, but the stars that I passed up there all adhere to a different time. Pointless hurt I see from my windshield upon reentry fell aside. You're not gonna believe this! Come in captain, do you read? Repeat, repeat, we come in peace. You're not gonna believe this! We're all gonna live in outer space one day. Our sojourner souls for another world await. We're all gonna live in outer space one day. Our sojourner souls for another world await.
4.
Marionette 03:51
Sometimes I feel like I'm from a different planet, should've been born galaxies away. No comfort in my foresight before kingdom come, with the space suit they gave me still on when I landed alone. I'm a casualty of this cultural war. We've lauded and baptized societal norms. Doubled up your standards to demonize the difference; tearing down the other to gain some common ground, what have we found? If the truth can destroy it, it should wipe it clean, because no ignorance is a true bliss, if we’d see it as it’s meant to be. Life, that is. Life, that is. I’ve taken the poisoned wine somewhere along my timeline that draws itself o'er chaos and back. Oh, and when you speak of the way things've always been, is that normalcy something worthwhile to be sought and conceived? I am not your marionette; ah, it is there and I'm not going to pretend. Is it not a tragedy to think you're the only kind? Nail it to the front door like your opinion is your god or mine. If the truth can destroy it, it should wipe it clean. Because no ignorance is a true bliss if we'd see it as it's meant to be. If the truth can destroy it, it should wipe it clean. Because no ignorance is a true bliss if we'd see it as it's meant to be. Oh, life, that is. Life, that is.
5.
Jonah 03:36
For you cast me into the deep, into the heart of the seas, and the flood surrounded me. All your billowing waves passed over me. You answered me when I called out in my distress. Out of the belly of Sheol I cried and you heard my voice. How can I doubt your word written upon my innermost veins? Still I've doubted your power that's always proved me wrong on my darkest of days. The waters closed in over me to take my life and the deep surrounded me. Weeds were wrapped around my head at the roots of the mountains. I went down to the land whose wilderness closed upon me forever, yet you brought my life up from the pit, oh Lord, my God. How can I doubt your word written upon my innermost veins? Still I've doubted your power that's always proved me wrong on my darkest of days. Never have you let me down without taking me higher. Never have you let me down without taking me higher. Never have you let me down without taking me higher. Never have you let me down without taking me higher. Then I said, I'm driven away from your sight, yet I shall look again upon my father’s house with my fainting eyes. When my life was fainting away, I remembered the Lord. When my heart betrays your spirit, you gently reach me at my very core. Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of a steadfast love. What I have vowed, I will pay because salvation belongs to my Lord. How can I doubt your word written upon my innermost veins? Still I've doubted your power that's always proved me wrong on my darkest of days. How can I doubt your word written upon my innermost veins? Still I've doubted your power that's always proved me wrong on my darkest of days.
6.
Buckskin 01:54
7.
I'm in the shelter that I've built with this momentary mortar and stone till the light rushes in and finally thaws out the cold. I'm temporarily in between the folds. I’m a homeless soul. They're passing me by, insured with work security. Oh, the cost of living will always be more than I can pay; trends like a wave we can chase to its end but never hold. I’m a homeless soul. No thief can steal the treasure unseen in my soul. I've lost my estate with no cash in the bank yet my debt, it is paid in whole. I’m a homeless soul. There’s an anchor in your hand, desperation woven in your threads, and it’s keeping you cold. Nothing you can put on can cover up this weather. There’s a melody in the souls of the unknown. The most unrelenting remedy is the one you cannot hold. No thief can steal the treasure unseen in my soul. I've lost my estate with no cash in the bank yet my debt, it is paid in whole. I've got investments that are out of this world. I've lost my estate with no cash in the bank, yet my debt, it is paid in whole. I've lost my estate with no cash in the bank, yet my debt, it is paid in whole. I’m a homeless soul.
8.
Forest Maker 04:21
I am not the solid one, no I’m not that kind. Blades of grass cut under me as I give to them some mind. Could I have thought of all of this? Will I begin to shine? Separate the mountains with a dance of your design. The water in a solid state congregates on my window pane as the searing truth, it washes me: am I not to stay the same? But hatred has no place here; there is no room left for shame. Fog fills in like the pain that I have felt since I began. There’s a person I’ve been dreaming of my mirror never shows, someone in the middle of the woods with moonlight glow. I dreamt of a crown of flowers and riddance of demise with no judgement and no history. May as well have dreamt to fly. Sunlight rises over the winter horizon, aching and stretching in the shell of my reflection. Forest maker, sing like you’re the only one. For the first time I am breathing, for now it’s taking my breath away.
9.
Resting in the wake with mercy on the edge of a heavier hand. Stronger words and a weaker frame cannot win the war that we've created. Relief on the far side is to reach for the remedy of the soul. Take what you will, awake what once was still. Always I will take, I'll take another way out. Always I will hail the awaited sound, yeah, I am not the first man to call upon it. I am not the first one to evade it. With no virtue of man, nor the faults of societies or nations will the earth be restored, but by he who with wisdom breathed it out. Take what you will, awake what once was still. Always I will take, I'll take another way out. Always I will hail the awaited sound, yeah, I am not the first man to call upon it. I am not the first one to evade it. Everyone surrounds him, the awaited sound, yeah; Everyone surrounds him, the awaited sound, yeah; Everyone surrounds him, the awaited sound, yeah; Everyone surrounds him, the awaited sound, yeah.
10.
I am a tree with no will to be planted by the stream. I've resisted any rest offered me. Determined alone, my own alone and lonely, ideal only for a time of my design. On and on and off I go, wresting for my own controlled unknown. Nothing is new under the sun; we wage a war that's already won. Nothing is new under the sun, but everything, everything will change. I've got all the time in the world cramped up in my mindset. Is this what you call providence, throwing the balance of my frame? My best laid plans are a selfish folly on my best days. I would lie down lonely with no foundations for any dreams to take their stage. On and on and off I go, wresting for my own controlled unknown. Nothing is new under the sun; we wage a war that's already won. Nothing is new under the sun, but everything, everything will change. My love, when we fall apart, I know that there is more. My nation, when we cave in on ourselves, I know that there is more. We won't live this breath forever. We won't live this breath forever. Everything will change. Everything will change. Everything will change.
11.
Darling, don't try and look around you to see what you need to know. This world will deny your worth, lie to you when you need to know it most. Gotta step through your front door sometimes and see there's more than what's on the outside. Because I will prove you wrong till you see yourself right. Dark are the days set behind you, riddled in your head as the ones before. I know you said you've felt forgotten, like a dream that evades your mind when you wake up. Look for something more real than what you see. The home you're made for is so sweet. I've forgone the great divide so you can live as you're meant to be. I'm so tired of chasing fantasy. I just want something real.
12.
Good Lord 04:37
Miraculously, I'm standing right here, unaware and yet fully alive. The in between canyons I see from my window, patiently, they purely abide. If you asked me at twenty one what happens next, I'd begin reciting my plans. Yeah, I could make guesses in my self preservation. I’d explain it the best that I can. Well, I'd be a fool to say I'll predict anything, like a tide we will ride in no reason. And every day since then, I’ve got tragedies invented with a voice that’s not mine or yours and they’ve taken their places, and all my premonitions are weightless in light of a life worth living. Well I'd be a fool to say I'll predict anything, like a tide we will ride in no reason. There is a progression, a flawless procession, like a bride walking down the aisle, like a river that runs to the ocean, with expectations resolved to weakness as the white of the tide. Providence is the ocean. Providence is the ocean and I’ve buried my head in the sand. I'd be a fool to say I'll predict anything, like a tide we will ride in no reason. There's a progression, a flawless procession, like a bride walking down the aisle, like a river that runs to the ocean, with expectations resolved to weakness as the white of the tide.

about

This album was written from March to October 2015 during the first year or so of our marriage, our move from East Tennessee to Indianapolis, graduating from college, beginning new jobs, and being acclimated to a new community in a different part of the country. The themes in this album reach to seasonal depression, the joy thief named comparison, space travel, racism/sexism in the media, homelessness, the book of Jonah, eternal destiny, kingdom come, encouragement to my wife and myself, personal identity, and earthly provision. This album was funded by playing concerts, selling merchandise, several part time jobs, begging on the streets, friends, family, and listeners like you. Thank you from the very bottom and top of my heart.

credits

released March 1, 2016

"Wilderness Hymnal" was produced by Jonathan Class and Brandon Wadley from November-December 2015; engineered by Jonathan Class and Alex Dobbert; recorded, mixed, and mastered at The Varsity Recording Co. in Anderson, IN by Jonathan Class and Alex Dobbert with additional editing by Caleb Schoeberg.

Brandon Wadley sang, played acoustic guitar, banjo, & harmonica, as well as piano on "The Great Divide," bass guitar on "Buckskin," and some percussion on "River and Its Rain;" Jonathan Class played keyboards, synthesizers, electric bass, & some percussion; Alex Dobbert played drums & percussion; Isaac Vining played electric guitar; Katie Wadley sang vocal harmonies on "Tell Me I'm Alright, "Good Lord" & "Marionette;" Gang vocals in "Man's Greatest Spaceflight" included Brandon & Katie Wadley, Cassidy O'Hara, Theresa Bitterman, Kyle Ingermann, & Peter Taylor. Kristen Weber played violin & viola and Emily Nelson played cello on "Tell Me I'm Alright" & "Awaited Sound,” and were recorded by Dan Knobler (of Mason Jar) at Goosehead Palace in Nashville, TN.

All songs written by Brandon Wadley. String sections on "Tell Me I'm Alright" & "Awaited Sound” arranged by Jonathan Class. All songs are sole property of Brandon Wadley.

GIGANTIC thanks to my wife Katie, Mom & Dad, Phillip & Erin, The Landrys, The Berends & the staff at MCJR, Granny, Mamaw & Papaw, the Classes, the Loftons, Nathan Partain, the Gaultneys, the Smiths, the Hickmans, the Burgins, the Collies, the Christenberrys, the Thomases, the Stolzfuses, Sally & Nikki, the Millicans, the Garners, the Taylors, the Morrells, the Hodges, Rachel Luther, Mallorie Williams, Cassidy O'Hara, the Siglins, the Branstrators, the Tafts, the Millers, the Marusichs, the Passwaters, Laura Traister, Kiley Ellingson, Asbury University, Joshua Cup, Westminster Presbyterian youth group, Trinity Church of Brownsburg, The Harrison Center for the Arts, Redeemer Indianapolis, The Willow Tree, Rocket 88 Doughnuts, Calvin Fletcher's, Foundry Provisions, and everyone else who ever showed up to a concert and made this miraculous journey possible! I can only humbly thank you.

All artwork by Brandon Wadley.

All songs copyright ℗ & © 2016 Brandon Wadley. All lefts and rights reserved.

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